How long have you been skating?
I’ve been roller skating since February 2014 when I started Tenderizing with Dominion Derby Girls. I may have went to one roller skating party back in the day- but that was a very long time ago.
What is your job outside of derby?
During the week I’m a child and family whisperer, kind of like The Dog Whisperer. And on the weekends I’m a professional tree climber and neurotic nut hoarder.
Do you have any pets/kids?
Two kids, which happen to be covered in fur, walk on four legs and speak in woofs and growls.
Who is your derby wife?
Texas Knockout! I’m not a fan of Texas- but for her, I’ll make a one-time exception!
Who is your favorite person to hit?
I’m all about equality- I love to hit everyone!
What made you choose roller derby?
It was fate, as some might say- ‘a sign from up above’—up above on the Starbucks bulletin board that is! The sign was announcing the start of ‘Tenderizing’ and ‘Fresh Meat’. Tenderizing started the next morning and I went out and bought some cheap skates, protective gear, showed up to practice and fell in love.
What would we find you doing on a Sunday afternoon?
I’m usually battling for my life against the terrorists in my backyard such as flesh eating box turtles, toe terrorizing snakes, ticks (need I elaborate?), freakishly large bullfrogs, spiders and the like, all while trying to pull weeds and garden.
Three words that describe you?
Spunky. Sarcastic. Reliable.
If you could meet anyone in the world, who would it be and why?
Rocket J. Squirrel (Rocky) because I’d love to learn how to fly and how to improve my patience when dealing with an ignoramus.
If you had a million dollars, what would you do with it?
I’d buy a stock pile of a variety of nuts and some dried fruit and veggies for the impending zombie apocalypse and build an underground nut storage facility that is zombie proof. I’d also set up a mental health facility to help my fellow nut hoarders.